What is skill regression after diagnosis? What is really happening?

“Why do some people seem to lose ability after a diagnosis (or when they believe they should be diagnosed)?”

This question often comes with frustration or confusion from managers:

“They were doing fine before. Then they got diagnosed — and now they say they can’t do things they were doing before. What’s going on?

It’s a fair question — and it points to a deeper truth about how people survive at work.

Many neurodivergent people spend years masking (though this term is very misunderstood and misused):

Essentially, we see people who feel they are:

• Working harder than everyone else to appear “on top of things.”

• Hiding overwhelm.

• Faking confidence in areas where they feel lost.

• Burning energy trying to look fine.

A diagnosis doesn’t create a problem — it reveals one.

It offers a new lens. A different story.

And often, it gives the person permission to stop doing the things that take thy highest toll.

It's not Skill Regression.

That “sudden drop” in ability isn’t new. It’s just visible now. It's not 'skill regression' as many would have you believe, in reality it's:

• Processing the past.

• Reconciling the challenges that have never been admitted.

• Giving oneself permission to say "yes, I do find this hard".

• Realising we may need to ask for more help and accepting that may come with questions.

  
  

It’s emotional too.

People may feel grief, anger, or exhaustion from years of pushing through without support. This can even lead to fractured relationships with manager's and colleagues where previously there were none.

They might notice new struggles simply because they’ve stopped suppressing their needs.

This doesn’t mean they’re choosing to underperform.

It means they’re finally acknowledging the cost of what they’ve been doing to keep up.

What can managers do?

• Understand the process.

Awareness changes how people. experience their environment. The same noise, demand, or. pressure may now feel impossible. to ignore.

• Respond with curiosity, not suspicion.

Ask: “What’s feeling harder now? What could make things more manageable?”

• Remember: this is progress.

The shift may look messy, but it. creates the chance for real. support to begin.

• Know: that this is new for them.

The person has no idea "when they'll feel able, capable, like they know what support they need".

When managers expect someone to go back to “how they were before,” they miss the opportunity to build something better — more sustainable, more honest, and more human.

The older we are, the harder this hits.

A diagnosis, especially a very late life one, when someone is over 40, carries more processing demand than most realise. It's a total reframing of who we are, why things are the way they are and 'if' they could have been different.

Be mindful as well not everyone is empowered by this new information. It can be deeply embarrassing, distressing and confusing for people to process let alone to try to explain to others.

Compassion, genuine desire to help not judge and time are the most crucial elements required.

How ThinkNeurodiversity helps?

If your leaders are confused or stuck, I can help unpack this with clarity and compassion.

I've been through this process and as a mentor to other late diagnosed folks I've guided them through as well.

They've shared their concerns and I've created toolkits that help them find space to process, tools to communicate the changes and a way to discover what diagnosis really means to them.

Here's the good news:

Processing isn't permanent.

In time most people find they're able to perform not just 'as well' as before but in many cases 'better'.

Being empowered to advocate for themselves provides people with a new confidence to voice opinions, ideas and to contribute in ways that are aligned to who they are and valuable to the teams they are in.

To find out more about Skill Regression, Masking and other terms often used by without context contact us today.

Our Neurodiversity Awareness Training for the workplace, managers and hr is grounded in evidence based, experienced and realistic frameworks that cut through the terminology and leave tools that help.

Book a discovery call here